Dirty Laundry: A Tale of Permissive Management and Missed Money Maximization

August 7, 2026

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The notion that women are more subject to persuasion when dependent on others is a generalization that does not apply universally to all individuals. A complex interplay of individual characteristics, situational factors, and Context influences people's susceptibility to persuasion. Gender, while it may play a role in shaping socialization and experiences, is just one of many factors that can affect a person's vulnerability to persuasion.


Key Considerations

 

Individual Differences

There is substantial variability among individuals, regardless of gender, regarding their susceptibility to persuasion. Personal traits, such as self-confidence, critical thinking skills, and assertiveness, can significantly affect one's resistance to persuasion.

Situational Factors

The context in which persuasion occurs is important. Vulnerability to persuasion may depend on the specific situation, the nature of the persuasive message, and the individual's emotional state at the time.


Psychological Factors

Psychological factors, such as cognitive biases, prior beliefs, and social influence, can all play a role in susceptibility to persuasion. These factors can affect people of any gender.

Cultural and Societal Influences

Cultural and societal norms and expectations can influence how individuals respond to persuasion. Norms vary widely across different cultures and communities.

 

Dependence and Interdependence

The extent to which an individual is dependent on others is just one factor to consider. People may be dependent in various ways, such as financially, emotionally, or socially, and these dependencies may influence their responses to persuasion differently.

Various factors influence people's responses to persuasion, and individuals can vary significantly in their susceptibility. It is helpful to approach these topics with nuance and avoid making gender-based generalizations.

"Male style is analytical and manipulative."

Another study of U.S. governors found that states with female leaders had lower fatality rates.

"There may be common learning experiences based on anatomical facts that help create some of the psychological reactions observed more often among women, i.e., their interest in interdependence, their idea that they must give up on something to get another, etc."

While it is true that there are some biological and hormonal differences between men and women, such as differences in their brain structure and function, it is not appropriate to directly link these differences to complex psychological reactions or behaviors.

 

The development of psychological traits and behaviors is influenced by biology, genetics, upbringing, cultural and societal norms, and individual experiences. Attributing specific psychological reactions solely to anatomical differences overlooks the complexity of human behavior and the interplay of multiple factors. Psychological traits cannot be simplistically attributed to gender or anatomical differences.

 

Scientific research generally recognizes that behavior and psychology are influenced by a combination of biological, genetic, environmental, and social factors. Researchers in psychology and neuroscience conduct extensive studies to understand these complex interactions better.

To further comprehend, one should refer to peer-reviewed scientific studies and research in psychology, neuroscience, and gender studies. It is important to approach these topics with nuance and respect for the diversity of human experiences and perspectives.

The tendency for women to belong to more organizations and circles than men can vary based on numerous factors, including individual preferences, cultural expectations, and life circumstances. There is no one-size-fits-all answer to this question, as women's and men's levels of involvement in organizations and social circles can vary widely.


Factors to Consider

 

Cultural and Societal Norms

Women may be encouraged or expected to participate in various community, family, or social organizations in some cultures and societies. These cultural norms can influence women's involvement in such groups.


Lifestyle and Life Stage                                                                                                                         

Life circumstances and lifestyle choices can impact participation in organizations and circles. Women may become more active in community organizations due to their roles as caregivers, including involvement in parent-teacher associations, neighborhood groups, or social clubs.


Work and Career

Career demands and work-related commitments can influence organizational participation. Some men and women may choose to be more or less involved in extracurricular activities based on their career demands and time constraints.

Individual Personality and Interests

 

Personal preferences and interests play a significant role. Some individuals, regardless of gender, are naturally inclined to be involved in multiple organizations and social circles, while others may prefer more limited involvement.


Availability and Access

The availability of organizations and circles in a particular community can also influence participation. In some areas, more opportunities for involvement in various groups may exist. Personal preferences and a complex interplay of societal, cultural, and individual factors influence the level of involvement in organizations and social circles.


"Women will give their will in submission in exchange for feeling secure and loved."


Based on the over 70 million profiles in the Wiley database, you are just as likely to encounter any of the four styles in society. Some copycat 'DISC' companies report the spread differently based on their database. One organization with only 24,000 profiles claims the majority are high "S's," a prejudicial error.


Despite claims by some DiSC novices, we do not have two personalities. Our primary personality style is observable when we are at emotional equilibrium. However, the "Productive Conflict" DiSC profile may reveal a completely different personality style.


Premarital Counseling                                                                                                                 

Clerics have extensively used DiSC for premarital counseling. Hence, the participants benefit from getting a glimpse past the rose-colored glasses of romantic love and being forewarned about possible stress behaviors and how we instinctively behave when triggered. 

Selected Resources

“Not even girls want to be girls so long as our feminine archetype lacks force, strength, and power. Not wanting to be girls, they don't want to be tender, submissive, peace-loving as good women are. Women's strong qualities have become despised because of their weaknesses. The obvious remedy is to create a feminine character with all the strength of Superman plus all the allure of a good and beautiful woman." – William Marston

Marston said, “She’s as lovely as Aphrodite, as wise as Athena, with the speed of Mercury and the strength of Hercules, but she is known only as Wonder Woman. From a psychological angle, it seemed to me that comics' first offense was their blood-curdling masculinity.” 

Marston's Biases

In Pine Junction, Colorado, a bucolic mountain setting in the foothills just an hour west of Denver, Colorado, the fragrant scent of pine needles accompanied my client, business owner Jeffrey whenever he descended one thousand vertical feet down to our office in the west side of Denver. The pine scent was a stark contrast to our working space’s caffeinated air. He had great sales campaign ideas which we never had time to deploy. He was a visionary behind an innovative startup. His enthusiasm was infectious, and the business concept held immense promise. Yet, as our sessions progressed, my unease crept into our meetings, a shadow cast by the operational realities back in their mountain home office, commandeered by his wife.


Jeff’s business was a partnership in multiplicative ways. He and his wife Sarah were co-owners. While Jeff focused on product development, marketing strategy, and, crucially, our consultations, Sarah was supposed to be managing back-end operations from their mountain home in the woods. Initially, this division of labor seemed logical. Jeff, the more urbane of the two, handled outward-facing aspects of the business, while Sarah, comfortable in her mountain sanctuary, did administrative work.


However, soon the idyllic picture began to fray around the edges. Small inconsistencies surfaced. Invoices went unpaid, leading to late fees and strained vendor relationships. Important client calls were missed, opportunities for follow-up squandered. The digital filing system, which should have been a model of organization, was a jumble of mislabeled documents and lost files.


At first, these were forgiven as minor hiccups, bumps in the road of a burgeoning business. But as I delved deeper into their financial reports and operational workflows, a disturbing pattern emerged. The amount of time Jeff was spending rectifying Sarah’s oversights was extensive. Hours that should have been dedicated to refining our sales campaigns, exploring new market segments, and nurturing important partnerships were instead being consumed by damage control.


The truth was that Sarah’s grip on the operational reins of systems and processes was tenuous. Her affinity for marijuana, a detail Jeff initially downplayed, was the elephant in their virtual office. Missed calls, unpaid bills, and disorganized files weren’t random errors; they were the consequences of a hazy mental landscape by an irresponsible adult.


The irony was too much for me to take. Although the business was positioned for growth, at the heart of things was a serious management issue that Jeff seemed unwilling, or perhaps unable, to address.


I broached the subject, highlighting escalating costs associated with these errors and opportunity cost losses. Jeff would agree and acknowledged the problems. I suggested implementing stricter protocols, clear lines of responsibility, or even a Frank conversation with Sarah about the impact of these mistakes, to which he would say, “I’ll talk with her,” but he never did.

“It’s… complicated,” he’d say, a familiar weariness in his voice. “She gets defensive. And, you know, it’s her house, her space…”  The unspoken hung heavy in the air: “she’s my wife.”


His reluctance to hold Sarah accountable, born perhaps out of a desire to avoid conflict or a misguided sense of marital harmony, was killing their business. The permissive management style, was creating a drag on cash flow. The lack of clearly defined roles and expectations, and the absence of accountability was killing of their dream.


Too late I realized that I was bailing water from a leaky ship while the captain refused to plug the holes. The upbeat, innovative startup spirit that had initially drawn me into the project was being killed by unaddressed errors. My expertise in business growth was being relegated to merely clean-up duty and not proactive sales campaigns we’d designed.


After witnessing this unsustainable dynamic, I made a tough decision and informed Jeff that I would quit if the problem was not fixed. While I framed my words professionally, the underlying truth was that I couldn’t, in good conscience, continue to invest time and energy into a venture where fundamental management issues were being ignored. This would not be the first time I chose to fire bad clients.


The experience crystallized my core belief about the intersection of personal relationships and professional endeavors. While the allure of working with a spouse can be strong, the failure to establish clear boundaries, to define roles and domains, and to establish mechanisms for accountability can be a fatal to business success…not to mention impacting their marriage.


To prove a point, I quit them and sold my marketing concept to one of their business rivals. Occasionally, I hear whispers through the grapevine that Jeff and Sarah’s business hasn’t completely collapsed, but that it never really achieved the potential once envisioned. The venture continues to be dimmed by operational fog and an apparent unwillingness to implement necessary self-discipline.


Their story serves as a potent reminder: Before embarking on the journey of building a business together, couples should have the tough conversations upfront. Define your separate domains (in writing!), list and understand personal strengths and weaknesses, identify core profitability functions, and, most critically establish a clear and objective process for navigating disagreements and addressing performance. Permissive management, especially when intertwined with personal relationships, can be a seductive but ultimately a destructive force.



Today, by assessing the pros and cons of couples conjoined at the business bank account, I join the ranks of others who’ve professionally assisted working couples, and share my observation that those who failed to prepare properly for unexpected shifts in dyad power dynamics, and who failed to have preventative ‘what-if’ scenario discussions in structured planning sessions before jumping into the execution stage of their strategy, usually failed totally or in part, sometimes in ways tolerated, as in the example above, or in unobserved, untracked, and invisible losses.


Given my business temperament, I must work on patience whenever I witness what seem to me to be obvious and loud planning errors, chronic inefficiencies, or unethical decisions being made by decision-makers. I’m an old-fashioned, traditional person in many ways and prefer order to chaos, and open communications to intrigue and mystery.


In order to cheer myself up from being down there in dusty, dirty Complaintsville, I must take my mind off the tragic business relationship failures I’ve witnessed; so, I’ll share some on topic good news: the state of romantic relationships currently. Is love still in need of love today?

The Covid lockdown changed everything, some things for the better. The social isolation effect gave us remote work and time to think, for many to decide to revolt against the overall economic system with the Great Resignation. To them, an opportunity to reflect more on family and life and to consider their personal values and other things like resigning or seeking other work opportunities. For a while, it was an employees’ market. (add my video) Once the Earthlings were quarantined, the world became largely inactive and quieter; animals and nature benefitted because the most dangerous and polluting species was caged for a while in their boxes.



Many people appreciated the abundance of social time, albeit it was largely via Zoom and similar platforms. Some realized more time to practice their faith, meditation, or forgotten hobbies or social interests, like cerebral intimacy with other people, and more relaxed time for romance and love. Would you like to hear the good news regarding the current upswing in traditional values like pitching woo? Do you think couples are more distant because of the lockdown or closer?

Love Endures All Things

“Love is patient, love is kind.  It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.  It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails.” – I Corinthians 13: 4-8

Current U.S. Relationship Trends

Kayla Crane reports in her survey report article, Surprising Statistics About Couples: Insights into Modern Relationships that things are on the upswing with 72% of adults being in a romantic relationship and 61% of individuals regarding their partner as their best friend. Marriage ratio rates remain steady at 6 in 1000 people, with divorce on the decline.

Summary of Kayla’s Key Statistics

  • 72% of U.S. adults are currently in a romantic relationship. Source
  • 61% of people say their partner is their best friend. Source
  • The U.S. marriage rate stands at 6.1 per 1,000 people. Source
  • About 40-50% of marriages end in divorce, though rates have been declining. Source
  • 65% of couples cite poor communication as their biggest challenge. Source
  • 20% of married couples experience infidelity, but 60% of those couples stay together after seeking support.
  • 30% of couples meet online, highlighting the rise of digital matchmaking. Source
  • 6% of U.S. adults are in non-monogamous relationships. Source
  • 50% of couples report that mental health issues affect their relationship, but 80% see improvement after therapy. Source

How to Prepare to Work as a Couple

Now that we have an understanding about couple relationships in general, let’s get to the point of this article, that couples who plan to work together first need to plan to plan several compatibility sessions. What needs to be discussed in their pre-action planning sessions?

Role Definition, Domains, and Performance Expectations

The first thing to do is to acknowledge that growing a business is challenging and demands a special temperament. One of the first things I learned from my entrepreneurial parents was that to deal with many people; i.e., customers, one needs a heart of forgiveness and patience.

Before you even look at your business growth strategic plan, first assess individual strengths and weaknesses and define roles and responsibilities in writing. What is each person’s operational territory and what outcomes are expected?

Open Hours

So as to avoid talking business during family time, determine what times you open and close your business mentally. What time are you open for business? Perhaps you do not want to start your day by immediately jumping into activities, but instead prefer to start slowly with stretching, breath-work, and meditation. Likewise, at what hour do you stop discussing business? Consider that not every task on the list is urgent, so don’t be pushed by the to-do list. Schedule routine tasks.

Power Dynamics Issues

The EverythingDiSC™ model reveals that it is natural for individuals to have different levels of various needs. When there is a great disparity in individual needs for dominance and control, interpersonal patterns of pressure and automatic compliance can evolve. This can work wonderfully if the more dominant personality always makes the best decisions, but that is unrealistic.



What if both parties are aggressive drivers who like to win? This can be a serious problem whenever a situation demands that push comes to shove. What do I recommend? Involve a disinterested third party to moderate discussions and to ensure that both parties practice active listening. Agree to effort toward workable compromises, as in peace negotiations. 

Preventative Conflict Plans

How will you handle inevitable conflicts? This can be a sticky point unless you have prepared a co-authored problem-solving process that clearly defines the specific problem in writing. Ideal outcomes from successfully solving the problem should be identified and listed. Paths toward resolution should be brainstormed, then tested in theory until optimal results are realized. If there is an impasse and you just cannot resolve the issue, table it for another time. This allows for reflection time and the potential for workable compromise.

Leadership and Isolation

One of the problems with a leadership role is that it can be lonely at the top. An amusing phrase is that “It’s lonely at the top but you can eat better.” Instead of being trapped alone in your office with your same old thinking and worrying patterns, visit local small business networking Meetup groups to connect with your peers, other business owners for support and encouragement. Self-esteem can be boosted by serving others, so attend to help others too.

Date Nights

What nights do you protect to nurture your relationship and to specifically avoid discussing anything that has to do with business. Naturally, there are exceptions, as with emergencies or the need to communicate with someone who lives in a distant time zone. Unless coupled business owners remain vigilant, they may forget to prioritize the health of their relationship and suffer negative consequences of neglect later. Protect your fun dates and enjoy several during the week, with strict adherence to the no business talk rule.

My Feelings about Co-Entrepreneurship

Genesis 2:18 - The Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.”


Why didn’t God think about making two humans at the same time? But, then, how does God ‘think?’ being that which is beyond definition, beyond our mortal understanding? Maybe Eve was His afterthought, a companion to share life, that is, if God ‘thinks’ as we do. Maybe a theology historian can elucidate about this for me. The point is, God created a wonderful duality that gave both someone to relate to mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. This first marriage, the “crown of creation” provided a helpmate who complemented man in some ways, a sustainability plan with procreation, and a shared feeling of union and completeness.


So, if God created such a wonderful bond, can they work together peaceably? If I ask a mixed crowd that question, I’ll likely get mixed replies. However, given how beautiful and joyful a healthy, happy bond is, let’s consider some of the good qualities of a super high-trust level, real love relationship.


Often, the best relationships are marked by open communications, mutual support and respect. If your personal relationship is founded on these values, chances are you will be able, all other things considered, to roll over the bumps in the road, to offer evaluation and correction to each other gently. The business arena can be an excitable arena emotionally. Surprises happen. Disappointments and delays occur, also, sometimes defections, as with the United States’ 2025 Trump tariff situation which touches the entire world, even hermit island penguins.

Co-entrepreneurial couples, if you first work on consolidating the foundations of your friendship and love, expect the rest of the business strategic planning process to go better than if you just impulsively jumped into the execution stage with your hot and lucrative concept.

 

-Frank DeDominicis

Resources

The TRUTH About Navigating Marriage & Business Together – a Biblical approach

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lVuPrrIywA8&t=1s


How we run a $100,000,000 business together...and STILL STAY MARRIED

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fMLXc5qvzAo


Entrepreneurial Couples                                                 

https://www.tonyrobbins.com/blog/entrepreneurial-couples?srsltid=AfmBOopCia7LxKYIs4yOC8tarfKyj7eywbRDlrN8fTE-Bz9MOcZ9X-dk


Surprising Statistics About Couples: Insights Into Modern Relationships

https://www.southdenvertherapy.com/blog/relationship-statistics-insight-for-couples


Surprising Statistics About Couples: Insights into Modern Relationships

https://www.southdenvertherapy.com/

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